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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24768550">Callous Connections</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/VenusOurania/pseuds/VenusOurania'>VenusOurania</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Détente [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Angst with a Hopeful Ending, Angst with an Ambiguous Ending, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Torture, Light Angst, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, One Shot, Past Torture, Thor (Marvel) is Not Stupid, Thor (Marvel) is a Good Bro</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 07:33:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,182</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24768550</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/VenusOurania/pseuds/VenusOurania</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It was no wonder Loki refused to claim Thor as his brother. Thor deserved far worse, for the kind of <em> brother <em> he'd been to Loki.</em></em></p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Loki &amp; Thor (Marvel)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Détente [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1752034</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>195</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Callous Connections</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Any other day, Thor would have barged in the room without so much as a warning. But today wasn’t any other day, nor did he think it would be for a long time. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He raised his hand to knock, but just before his hand could connect with the door, it swung open. Thor blinked at it for a second before he stepped in. Loki was sitting on the bed, a book open on his lap. He looked… relaxed. Not that Thor wanted his brother to be tense and wary, but he’d expected something… different, especially from what he’d heard their mother say. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Before he could speak, Loki said without looking up from his book, “You were standing there for a long time, thought I’d make it easier for you.” He turned a page. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you want to talk to me?” Thor asked. Mother had said not to push him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Thor opened his mouth, before closing it, “I can’t tell if you’re joking or not.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Loki finally kept the book aside, rolling his eyes as he swung his legs over the bed and on the floor, “I let you in, didn’t I?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Thor shrugged and came closer. Up close, Thor could see that Loki was still too pale. And his face still looked thinner than usual. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Stop staring,” Loki’s snapped words pulled Thor out of his stilted thoughts. Thor gave a nervous chuckle, unable to really hide his uncertainty while dealing with his brother. He’d been so wrong about so many things, and from what Mother and Father told him, he’d also suffered a lot. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Cautiously walking over to Loki, Thor sat beside him on the bed. For a moment, he contemplated hugging him, but then thought better of it. Loki probably wouldn’t appreciate it right now. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Brother… I'm sorry." </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"For what." The flatness of Loki’s voice made Thor wince. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"For not noticing that there was… was something wrong with you on Midgard." Thor regretted his choice of words even before Loki's face twisted.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"There's nothing </span>
  <em>
    <span>wrong </span>
  </em>
  <span>with me," Loki snarled. Thor reared back a little. Wrong move, he thought, mentally back pedalling. Loki was volatile right now, that’s what Father had said. Mother had said to be gentle. To not push. To take care of his little brother. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I-- for not noticing that you were suffering. For not noticing that you would never do something like that." He amended, quickly. He truly didn't know what to say that won't aggravate Loki. He still didn’t know how what his father had said that day on the bridge had pushed him over the edge, had made him let go. Thor’s throat clogged up a little, and he coughed once. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Loki turned to look at him, eyes narrowed a little. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, brother,” Thor repeated. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re a fool, Thor.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Thor shook his head, “I </span>
  <em>
    <span>am</span>
  </em>
  <span> sorry, Loki.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You sound like a parrot,” Loki huffed. Thor snorted, before sobering quickly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What do you want me to say?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you even know what you’re sorry for?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“For not noticing that something was wrong on Midgard--” Loki cut Thor off abruptly.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“If you’d noticed that something was wrong on Midgard, Thor, my plan would have failed. Half my plan was hinged on the fact that you’d be a hot headed fool and try to take me down the minute you saw your precious mortals in danger.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Thor flushed, barely resisting the urge to flinch. Loki knew him well, too well. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>had</span>
  </em>
  <span> been a hot headed fool. Wrenching Loki off the quinjet and taking off, and then getting in a fight with Tony Stark and Captain Rogers. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Most of his emotions must have been playing on his face, because Loki rolled his eyes, “Stop thinking, you look constipated. I counted on that behaviour, so I can’t really be upset at you for it, can I?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Maybe, maybe if he had been the Thor from before his botched coronation, he wouldn’t have noticed the slight undercurrent of something in Loki’s voice. But he wasn’t. His exile, Loki's fall, the Chitauri invasion and… this discovery. It had left Thor reeling and more than a little changed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And he knew he had hurt Loki.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Maybe Loki had been expecting it. Maybe he’d even wanted it. But that didn’t negate the fact that it </span>
  <em>
    <span>hurt</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Thor looked at Loki, and he looked so small. At first glance, he looked just like he always did. Straight back, poised, graceful and staring off into the distance, perhaps concocting some new mischief or thinking of some new spell. But another glance and Thor could see the slight quiver of his shoulder, the slouch in his back, the waxy pallor of his skin and the deliberately blank look in his eyes as he stared at a point on his bookshelf.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That doesn’t mean what I did wasn’t wrong,” Thor said softly, scooting closer to Loki, making him tense a little, eyes widening. Thor continued, “You’re my brother, I should have questioned your motives, should have thought twice about what you were doing, why, how, not jumped to the worst conclusions. We had been brothers for over a thousand of years.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“People don’t change in a handful of days,” Loki said stiffly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No, they don’t.” Thor agreed, grimacing. </span>
  <em>
    <span>But I shouldn’t have had to. I should always have been like this. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Loki looks taken aback for the smallest of moments before he regains composure again. His lips twitched, “I wasn’t a saint either.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Thor blinked for a second, before huffing out a laugh, “Not for a moment.” </span>
  <em>
    <span>But you weren’t the villain either. </span>
  </em>
  <span>He didn’t say that, though. The word ‘villain’ cut things a little too black and white, and he didn’t think things were so simple here, even with Thanos. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well,” Loki said, “It worked in our favour anyway.” And for a moment, it felt like Loki was the one comforting Thor, and it was so absurd that Thor wanted to laugh hysterically at it. Loki was the one who’d suffered because of Thor’s incompetence, arrogance, and ignorance. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I wish it hadn’t come to that at all.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’d have thought you’d have realised it by now that the world doesn’t really work the way you want it to, Thor,” Loki said, not unkindly, but as a fact. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Quirking a smile, Thor said, “Well then, what’s the point of being called a god?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Loki smirked, shaking his head, “I think the All-Father had something to say about that.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He had, hadn’t he? They weren’t really gods. Just because some mortals had worshipped them some thousand years ago didn’t mean they actually </span>
  <em>
    <span>were </span>
  </em>
  <span>gods. If only… </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I…” Thor started, unsure of how to phrase it, and when Loki  turned to face him his words seemed to frizzle out further, “Loki,” he cleared his throat. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Loi raised a sardonic brow, opening his mouth to no doubt deliver a mocking comment. And Thor hastily forged forward, because he knew he would lose all courage he had if he didn’t, “I feel like I should apologise for more than just what happened in Midgard.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Loki stared at him for a moment, his face so perfectly blank that for a moment Thor thought Loki was going to do some spell on him, perhaps turn him into a rat or something. But then he said, “And would you?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>For a moment, Thor was thrown off. He had expected Loki to ask what for, given his refusal to the necessity for an apology for whatever happened on Midgard. But on this… the chill in his eyes reminded him uneasily of Midgard. Of their fight on the Bifrost. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Thor almost frowed, but knew that it would probably not be well received. So Loki did want an apology for that, but he didn’t… expect one? Was he questioning Thor’s sincerity? Thor felt that his ignorance on Midgard should have been far greater grievance than whatever ways he’d grieved Loki when they’d been children, but Loki clearly seemed to think otherwise. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course, Loki. I’ve not been the best brother-” Loki snorted at that, but Thor continued, ignoring him, “But I do love you, and I will do my best to be better for you.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Still didn’t hear the apology.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Thor blinked, mouth parting, looking at Loki where he was staring back at him evenly, but Thor could see his lips twitching ever so slightly. “I am sorry,” Thor said slowly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hm.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?” Thor asked, because he knew, desperately, that there was something wrong. He was doing something wrong and Loki wasn’t telling him, and he couldn’t just let it go like he used to because otherwise it would fester and grow and get out of control like it did during his coronation and Thor couldn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>let it happen again. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re still as clueless as you used to be, Thor,” Loki sighed, shifting on the bed as he drew his legs back up on the bed and leant back against the headboard of the bed, his legs sprawled over in front of him, and hands folded on his lap.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What do you mean?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“See?” Loki quirked a brow, smiling slightly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>This time, Thor didn’t hold back his frown, more of a scowl, really, “And you still never speak clearly.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s a talent.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They were quiet for a while and Thor was the one to break first, “Brother…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thor, you apologise for what happened on Midgard but you don’t know why it happened. You still don’t understand why you should be apologising for whatever happened </span>
  <em>
    <span>before</span>
  </em>
  <span> Midgard, you really don’t see how everything went wrong, you think I am </span>
  <em>
    <span>overreacting</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” The bitter twist of Loki’s mouth made Thor wince. And then the words registered, sending a flash of irritation through him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>What didn’t he understand? He knew he’d belittled Loki, he knew he’d hurt his brother’s feelings because of that and that Loki had taken it all to heart. That it’d all driven Loki off to suicide which led him to the Chitauri and Thanos and then the invasion. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He knew the part he played in it, what else did Loki want from him? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Loki smiled at him knowingly, as if he could read his thoughts. And Thor shifted uneasily. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know I didn’t notice how affected you were by everything,” he started, treading carefully, but as he spoke, he understood, little by little, “I’m truly sorry about that. When I was in Midgard, you were suffering here in Asgard. The revelation of your birth, and then father falling into Odinsleep would have been bad enough. But having to rule the kingdom at war I left behind would have made everything worse.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Loki was quiet, and if Thor didn’t know any better, he’d have said the expression on his face was actually stunned. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Thor forged on, “And the fact that the realm we were at war with was your… birthplace, didn’t make it any better. And the- and the things I’d said about the Jotnar… I’m sorry, Loki.” Thor curled his fingers over the bedcovers, realisations sinking in. All this… and this was all before Loki fell into the Void, before he fell into the clutches of the Chitauri and the Other and Thanos and was tortured and used. Thor reigned in a shudder. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>No wonder his brother had returned half crazed and almost unrecognisable. The question was, </span>
  <em>
    <span>why had anyone not questioned it?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And that’s when the second, more startling realisation sunk in. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That was what Loki was actually hurt about. That they never noticed. That they actually, genuinely, never noticed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was obvious, really, of course. This was exactly what he’d been upset about, it was right in front of them, and they knew that. But Thor didn’t really understand that until now. Not until he’d sorted it out in his own head and spoken it from his mouth.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You really are, aren’t you?” Loki murmured under his breath.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t think you’re overreacting,” Thor said quietly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“After being tortured for a year and having someone violate my mind?” Loki said, his familiar snark creeping back into his voice, but it lacked its usual conviction. “Thank you for saying that my reactions are valid, Thor.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Thor flinched, because yes, of course Loki wasn’t overreacting. Shaking his head, Thor bit his lip. He could see why Loki would be acting like this, and was grateful it wasn’t worse.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Is there something I can do to make up for it?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Loki stared right back at him, and it was starting to get unnerving. Loki was supposed to be quick witted, and he always had a reply right at the tip of his tongue. These long assessing gazes disturbed Thor, and he didn’t know what to expect. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“If you want to make up for the things you did, brother, you’ll have to come up with the answer on your own.”  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course,” Thor muttered, turning his head away, repressing the urge to sigh. They had time now, and he </span>
  <em>
    <span>will</span>
  </em>
  <span> make it up to Loki. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>will</span>
  </em>
  <span> be better. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And it was when he was halfway to his own chambers that he realised Loki had called him </span>
  <em>
    <span>brother</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This legit took me weeks to complete. Like, damnit, the words wouldn't come. And I was in such wildly different moods while writing it. Like, I love Thor, and I love Loki. When I started writing it, I was neutral like that. But somewhere down the line in a matter of days, a rage aginst Thor's treatment of Loki descended upon me, and idk if that's visible upon the writing or not, but wow, by the end it had receded but it almost turned itno Thor bashing, almost. I still love Thor though, so guess that stopped me. </p>
<p>This series has got too much potential to become a The Dark World fix it fic, and I might just go through with it, I have also got some ideas to turn the fix it into a frostiron because why not and I am digging myself into a hole, send help. </p>
<p>Aaah, this was shorter than the previous two parts but I still hoped it managed to convey everything ti was supposed to? Tell me your thoughts!!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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